


Cared For

by beelivia



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, tender love and care
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-25
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-08-29 07:39:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16739848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beelivia/pseuds/beelivia
Summary: Sonny cares for Rafael after a rough case.





	Cared For

**Author's Note:**

> Giveaway prize for @iworldlywriter on tumblr

Even after years on the job, there are some cases that hit Rafael hard. They’re unpredictable; sometimes a case is no issue, others, a nearly identical one a few months later sends him into a spiral he struggles to get out of. Usually it’s the DV cases that hurt most. Especially when the kids are involved. Memories push his head underwater and the only way he can find a way to pull himself back up is to bury his brain in a bottle of expensive scotch he can’t afford this month without having to pull too much overtime to be healthy.

He’s considering it now, standing in the liquor aisle of the pharmacy and staring at an array of cheap booze with which to burn his tongue. It would be so much easier to forget than to push through the pain. Years of this have taught him to drink alone in his living room so no one can cut him off when he gets too drunk in the bar, and to not answer his phone in case someone decides he’s drunk enough to warrant a visit to check in on him.

As he considers what to buy this time, his personal phone starts ringing in his pocket. He’s inclined not to answer, but once he sees Sonny’s name and photo on the screen, he knows he should probably answer.

“Hey,” he says. His voice comes out more uneven than he expects it to. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, um, I’m off work early, so I thought I’d make us some dinner. I dropped by your apartment but you’re not home.”

Rafael has a choice to make right now. He could come up with an excuse, send Sonny home, and throw himself a pity party all night. Or, he could do what Sonny’s always suggested, and just let himself be cared for when he needs it. It’s tempting. He realizes he’d much rather spend the evening with his boyfriend than this.

“Sounds good. I’ll be home in ten, anything you want me to pick up while I’m out?”

“Nah. See you soon. Love you, babe.”

“Love you too, bye.”

Even such a short conversation, hearing that he’s loved, has made enough of a difference for Rafael to turn away from the liquor without hesitation. He’s actually looking forward to going home to whatever Sonny’s cooked for him, enough to temporarily dull the memories of the case and, by extension, his own childhood. As he walks out of the store and back towards his apartment, he almost doesn’t feel the lick of his father’s belt coming down harshly on his sensitive skin. He almost doesn’t hear his mother screaming. He almost doesn’t feel the ache in his chest. 

It’ll be better when he gets home, he tells himself.

When he unlocks and opens his door a few minutes later, the lighting inside is dim, restricted to just the gentle glow of the few candles he keeps around his house. The air smells like spices, whatever it is that Sonny’s making in the kitchen that smells just as warm as the light from the candles fills the intimate space. Two glasses of wine have already been poured on the table. Sonny glances over at the sound of the door opening and throws him a smile, not saying anything yet as Rafael kicks off his shoes, sheds his coat, and loosens his tie. Three small things lift a thousand pounds off his shoulders in an instant. 

“Have a seat, it’ll be ready in a few more minutes,” Sonny says in an uncharacteristically soft voice.

Under normal circumstances, Rafael would be annoyed, but he finds it comforting tonight instead. He knows Sonny isn’t patronizing him, he’s only taking care of him. And that’s what he needs right now. Before sitting down, Rafael pops into the kitchen to wrap his arms around Sonny from behind and just hold on for a moment. He can smell whatever’s cooking even better now, opens his mouth for a taste which Sonny gives him without hesitation. 

“I love you,” Sonny reminds.

“I love you too.”

He goes back to the table to sit down and wait, taste whatever wine Sonny’s picked out to pair with their meal. He’s always been somewhat of a snob about his wine, so Rafael knows that anything he picks will be fantastic. Everything about Sonny is so much better than Rafael deserves, including the fact that anytime he senses Rafael feeling that way, he reminds him how loved and desired he is. How important he is. And he really needs that, especially after cases like these.

It’s only a couple minutes before food is ready, and Sonny serves him a heaping plate wafting fragrant steam up into his face. It looks as good as it smells. Tastes better when he takes his first bite. Italian comfort food secretly lies among Rafael’s favorites, but only when it’s been prepared by Sonny’s deliberate hand. He dreams of the way those hands dance over the pan as if it’s some magi ritual crafted specifically for Rafael to soothe himself in the beauty of. 

“We don’t have to talk about it,” Sonny says softly, “but if you want to, I’m always here to listen.”

“I know.”

Sonny smiles at him softly and doesn’t speak up again while they eat, content with the quiet atmosphere they build together over their seldom shared evening meals. True to form, the meal is good until the last bite, and the paired wine rolls over Rafael’s tongue with each delicate sip because he’s decided he doesn’t want to get drunk. He never wants to be drunk around Sonny, too afraid of becoming his father, too afraid of becoming the man who he failed to convict today and had to send a tearful little boy back to. 

When everything is gone, Sonny clears the plates and kisses the top of Rafael’s head before pulling him from his seat and leading him to the bathroom. One of the amenities Rafael needed in his apartment was a bathtub. Nothing relaxes him more after a rough day than a warm bath with a damp towel over his eyes.

Sonny knows that, and Rafael is only half surprised to see the bath already drawn, bubbles on its surface. Steam fogs the mirror and clings to Rafael’s skin, a testament to the heat of the water. He doesn’t even have to undress himself because Sonny undoes each button of his shirt with something like reverence, takes the time to ease it off of tense shoulders carrying the weight of Rafael’s past.

And once Sonny helps him into the tub and puts the damp towel over his eyes and sits there beside him, stroking a long-fingered hand through Rafael’s hair and humming some song that Rafael vaguely recognizes, he realizes that he doesn’t need anything else in the world but his boyfriend. There’s no one he loves more. With every tandem breath Sonny takes, with every steady thud of Rafael’s heart against the inside of his ribcage, he relaxes. The rest of the world can wait for a little while. And Rafael, with a full stomach and a full heart, is completely okay.

**Author's Note:**

> Check me out on tumblr @honeycarisi


End file.
